--For when I am applying for a part-time job in addition to my position as being the lead singer of The Attractive People and of course, the Master Of The Universe.
Hello, my name is Storey Kerr, though you may have seen my face on one of these everyday items, like such as; a cereal box, shampoo bottle, soup can, milk jug, egg carton, etc.
But do you know about my many accomplishments? No? Well, then let me name a few; 92 Nobel Peace Prizes, 104 Oscars, 303 Emmys and 83 nominations for President of Alaska, Canada, Umerica and America.
I also support many charities such as; No Child Left Behind, Ppl wo Carn't Sple, Dyslexics of America, and Me for Lysol.
But you may still be asking yourself, "How do I become as rich, successful and powerful as Storey?" Well, it's simple; become an icon, a household name, that's how. Tips on success: always brush your teeth with a golden brush, use deodorant that smells like money, dream bigger than big, don't give your money away, and most importantly, always have an assistant, and listen to good music, and say Awesome all the time.
I AM AWESOME AND YOU ARE NOT SO AWESOME BUT I NEED A JOB SO HIRE ME THE FUTURE MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE
Because Alaska will be its own country by that point.
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